It's so cold.....

From the B&G News:


...I just pissed slush.

...I just ate a popsicle, and realized it was my big toe.

...My dog is stuck to the fire hydrant.

...instead of milk, I put anti-freeze in my coffee.

...I slipped on some ice and shattered

...I saw a penguin wearing fleece.

......when i fart the crap particles freeze together. I put it in an igloo cooler and sent it off to a lab to get tested....followed by another poster saying...Just heard from the lab. They found sperm. Lots and lots of sperm.

...I saw a lawyer with his hands in his OWN pockets

...My shadow froze to the sidewalk.

...The local flasher was caught describing himself to women.

...Clinton is sleeping with his own wife in order to keep warm.

...The fire department advises you to set your house on fire.

...The steam off my head created a war between 2 Indian villages.

...Hitchhikers are holding up pictures of a thumb.

...I saw a squirrel knitting a little bag to keep his nuts warm.

...the hookers downtown are charging 20 bucks just to blow on your hands

...Al Gore is saying, "Screw it, let's burn some coal."



Thank you to the Blue and Gold News and the posters there for a little comical relief on this cold morning. The temp is currently -3 degrees F with a Wind Chill of -7 Degrees F.



GROUNDHOG (Phil) STEW


1 Groundhog name Phil
2 onions, sliced
1/2 cup celery, sliced
Flour
Vinegar and water
Salt and pepper
Cloves

Clean Phil er I mean Groundhog; remove glands; cut into serving pieces. Soak overnight in a solution of equal parts of water and vinegar with addition of one sliced onion and a little salt. Drain, wash, and wipe. Parboil 20 minutes, drain, and cover with fresh boiling water. Add one sliced onion, celery, a few cloves, and salt and pepper to taste. Cook until tender; thicken gravy with flour.



I'm not making any suggestions.....Phil